i am about to study in Arabic or Spanish again. but my heart is going to the Arabic. if i learn another language, it is more competitive. but first, i want to reach appropriately English level. the more studied english, i always felt i still lack of skill to listen. when i studied english first time, i thought the speaking is the best important thing but now i think the listening skill is the best thing more than speaking. so, i am trying to hear and listen english through Youtube such as pop-song or Arirang TV. sometimes, i don't know what their means even though i saw the english subtitle. it makes me discourage to study again. i am pretty sure that i am doing study constantly but why i always feel that still stand around same place. of course, i felt i went to upstairs a few months ago. i don't know when i am going to go upstairs next time. if i seize one moment in time what i want to moment, i will really really hold on strongly. so, my nervous thing keep pushing on the other side untill relieve. and i still keep going forward because it doesn't matter to me develop my skill or not. if i keep walking on this road, someday i will arrive that believe. among the reason that want to go abroad is that i want to upgrade my level effectively. what i am worried is wasting my money and time. because it is not effectively. so, i am checking my plan everyday. i make a plan pretty huge af first. and adjusting a little bit to fit my the present. while this doing, i don't forget what i want. it is kind of my road-map for not to forget. and when i am lazy, i keep pushing to study while i look at the road-map.
their makes me more constantly to study and anything. when i was in the high school, i thought if i study harder, i can get a good grade. but looking backwards, it was the something wrong. because at that time, i didn't study constantly. i given up in the middle of. because it was the exhausted. but i know now that there is timing at i am doing hard. so, i have to do constantly anything until coming the moment i have to work hard. so, at that time, i can show them what i have properly. and my work hard time is coming soon. and i can ready to run to what i want. until that time, i just save up my energy. and i know that it is not time for me to run.
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